I wonder how many women out there have undiagnosed ADHD. Or Bipolar? Or Autism? If only they could find the key to unlocking why they are the way they are. It fills in so many gaps in your life when you discover the key to your personality … your being …. your self. It satisfies that need, that want in yourself to understand yourself. It’s a very powerful feeling indeed to understand yourself fully and completely or even just a lot more than you did before the diagnosis or discovery. I fully believe that self-diagnosis is quite valid. It’s necessary, in fact, I believe for you to believe in yourself and to take a formal diagnosis to that next level of comprehension and feeling.
It’s only when we know ourselves that we become comfortable with who we are in our skins. Only then can you love yourself fully and completely.
It’s a form of autism, of a sort. Not high functioning autism as some may call it, but close to it – a close relative you may well say.
Asperger’s syndrome is named after Hans Asperger, a German psychologist whose work was mostly carried out in the 1930’s. He observed young boys with a different set of mind skills. He recognized that they were different to neuro-typical humans. His work was largely forgotten for a few decades until the 1960’s when people picked up on it. Since then, it’s been a huge step forward in people’s lives when they are able to put a name, a syndrome that they’ve been living with their entire lives.
For myself, I had developed bipolar after the birth of my second daughter. I was seeing a psychiatrist on a regular basis and had read some books on bipolar. I said to her one time “I feel that there is something different about me than just bipolar. I feel different from others”. She came back to me with the suggestion that I check out the book “Aspergirls” by Rudy Simone. It’s a book written by Rudy who, herself has Asperger’s, in an effort to educate. Girls who have Asperger’s tend not to be noticed as much as boys do. Females, in general, tend to project their Aspie nature in a subtle and different way than males with Asperger’s.
It was 2009 when I discovered I had Asperger’s after reading that book. It was like reading my life novel on paper, with almost everything I’d lived for the past 40 odd years written down in some form or another. I was 48 years old and finally knew why I was the way I’ve been for all those years. Finally, I was able to embrace the feeling that I was simply different, not defective. I was unique and not broken. My psychiatrist used to regularly remind me that I was very special to my family and friends. “You are not broken Deb, just differently wired than others.”
I know I talk too loudly – that’s one of the common things in Aspies. I know I talk too much about boring things that interest me. I know I’m selfish to a certain extent. I know a lot of things about me that are now explained.
Have a read of the wikipedia article if you’d like. Got a lot more facts than I’ve been able to include.