I have discovered another blog I used to write in.
https://toriauru.wordpress.com/ Contains some of the thoughts I had back in 2006 to 2009 approx. A few of the posts are a bit painful for me to read again. I can remember the struggles I had and efforts I took to overcome those hurdles of my mind. I think that one post where I describe going to see my psychiatrist in 2009 was when she suggested I may have Asperger's syndrome and to read up on it and let her know.